Saturday, August 30, 2008

It Just Struck Me...

...Sarah Palin == Jane Swift with slightly better karma.

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Notes From The First Month of Fatherhood

The first month is in the books. Piper was born four Tuesdays ago; we've been home from the hospital for a bit over two weeks now. The word that rings the most with me is "grueling", but grueling in a different way than, say, a business trip to Grand Rapids, or a good case of the runs.

I haven't slept more than five hours straight since Tara went into the hospital 31 days ago today.

I've got the debris of several dozen cardboard boxes worth of flat-pack furniture, strollers, playpens, and assorted baby ordnance in a big pile in the living room. My adorable little daughter does little apart from eat, sleep, and project various substances from inside her body onto whatever shirt I happen to be wearing.

I'm able to translate the eight or nine versions of the only word she's able to come out with to this point--"waaaaah"--and have cured the nastiest (that is to say, only) case of diaper rash I've ever seen (for those interested: corn starch, airing it out, and lots of those absorbent pads whose primary purpose is for housebreaking puppies). She stops crying when we hold her, feed her, burp her (I did not realize quite how long THAT process was going to end up taking), or swaddle her, and for the most part pretty much stays where we put her.

She, like her parents, is nocturnal. While she sleeps through most of the day like a diapered sausage in the sun, her 1:00 and 5:00am feedings turn into these marathon rock-a-bye-baby sessions before she finally accepts being put down without version #4 of "waaaah"--the one that means "you ain't done holding and rocking me, sucka. Oh no you ain't."

But the whole of it is just postscript when she opens those eyes and stares at you. I mean, look: I've seen a lot of ugly babies, you know? Hate to say it, but it's true. Not every baby is cute; that's all there is to it. And while I'm possibly biased, I really think, by all objective measures, that my daughter is truly in the top 5% of the overall baby cuteness rankings:

Would this face lie to you?

So yeah, I'd write more, including the story of Piper's high-level meetings with the mayor, our state representative, and junior US Senator/unelected Presidential candidate, but I think I hear good ol' waaaah #4 coming from the bassinet to my left. Time to spring, albeit slowly and wearily, into action.

Thanks to everyone, by the way, for their thoughts and best wishes. More as she--and we--continue to develop.